Note to Self: 10 Things I Have Learned In My 20s

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Note to Self: 10 Things I Have Learned In My 20s

“Enjoy the shxt out of your life. Don’t overvalue casual relationships. Pursue your passions and explore your humanity” –Brenden Dilley

As I am exploring my “roaring 20s”, I am starting to notice things about myself that I love, hate, appreciate, and need to work on. This is an excerpt of my daily writings from the point of view of a real 20 something year old. Enjoy!

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Stop searching for validation. Once I learned this lesson, I began to feel a sense of free will and happiness. I cannot count the number of times where I would only do something because my best friends or my parents approved of it, and half of those times I only did it to please them. Nothing feels better than knowing that you are doing something for yourself and not another person.

You’re going to have your good days, but you’re also going to have your bad days. Looking back on my childhood, my problems back then seemed so small compared to now. I remember how I would get sad because my 4th grade “boyfriend” broke up with me. Simple problems right? Now when I have my bad days, I just look back on those memories and remember that everything is going to be okay. Life gets harder as you grow up, but nothing helps a person mature faster than adversity. So next time you are having one of your bad days, just sit back and laugh at those silly problems you had as a kid.

Work for everything you want. Sometimes you might even have to work harder than the next person. One thing I’m learning is you never know when your support system is going to be taken away from you, so it is better to be prepared. Have a good job, work hard in school, learn to cook, and learn to do your own laundry. Be an adult because mommy & daddy won’t always be there.

Help yourself before you help others. As selfish as it sounds, it is honestly the truth. I cannot count the number of times I have sacrificed my priorities for other people and at the end of the day I find myself with the shorter end of the stick. If you are one of those people, please read this paragraph again. Nobody in this world is going to hold you down as hard as you would hold yourself down. Once you have taken care of yourself, then you can go ahead and lend a helping hand.

Once you have formed strong bonds, hold on to them. College is the only time in your life that you are going to make and/or keep strong friendships. The relationships people form with others in college is unbreakable because those are the years when you struggle the most, especially with food and money. There have been times where I did not have a penny to my name and my roommates will pitch in $5 on pizza for me to eat. That right there is what I consider true love. A friend going out their way for your well being shows that they genuinely care about you.

Network! Network! Network! You never know who your future employer is so start creating positive relationships now. I know of so many people who have gotten full time jobs right after college because they went to a networking event a few years back. Employers like to see people who go out their way for what they want. Once you have made those connections, make sure you keep a frequent contact with them. What I tend to do is shoot a quick email about twice a year to them so they will remember that I am still alive.

Surround yourself with like-minded people. You are the company you keep. You are also the product of your environment if you let yourself be. By having positive influences in your life, you tend to have a much happier aura around you. You will come across people throughout your journey who want you to be on the same unsuccessful level they are on, but the key is to not let that get to you. Friends will come and go, just remember that the friends that are for you will stick around at the end.

You are beautiful. If nobody else thinks that, then forget them and love yourself. Self-love is the foundation for any healthy relationship. The world can be very cruel sometimes especially with the pressure to look how these girls look on social media. Remember that beauty comes in different ways and you do not need to get validation on whether you are beautiful or not.

This is the only time you will truly be single, enjoy it. Life flies by so fast that before you know it, you’re going to be married with a career and kids. If you’re single, do not worry because you have many years ahead to be married. If you’re in a relationship, stay young and keep it fun. Nothing is worst than turning 30 before you turn 20. If you are lonely, take the time out to get to know YOU and fall in love with yourself.

Find your purpose. Your 20’s are your selfish years. Love yourself first, try a new hobby, go on adventures with your friends, read books, and try new things. There have been plenty of times where I have forced myself to step outside my comfort zone and ended up learning something new about myself. The most important thing I am learning right now is to take every opportunity possible to grow into a better person.  Nobody wants to wake up at 65 with the bitter realization that their whole life has been unfulfilling. Time flies, so enjoy every moment that is given to you.

Feel free to comment below or start a twitter conversation on @TheSOABrand. We would love to hear your advice about life.



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